Do Women Really Want What They Can't Have?
Feb 08, · loveallfind.com this video (based on a true case study), we look at why women want what they can't have. Women respond. Indifference: Women Only Want What They Can't Have. When I left college I was an AFC (average frustrated chump). I took a year off and spent a lot of time working out my mistakes and then joined university with the knowledge of what I then called "the game." The game was a very small part of basic Don Juaning, just how to use INDIFFERENCE to get a girl.
You can't always get what yave want. But if you try sometimes You just might find You get what you need. The affections of a person who was with someone else? That dream job? The last cinnamon-raisin bagel snapped up by the customer in front of you? These scenarios range from trivial to potentially life-changing, but they all have one thing in common:. Heightened attention: When something is hard to get or forbidden you immediately pay more attention to it.
Whst heightened attention -- which can escalate into obsession -- makes the forbidden food seem very important. Your inner brat takes advantage of this, and tries to convince you that you MUST have that chocolate or pizza. Perceived scarcity: When something is scarce or in short supply, its perceived value increases.
You want it more because you think other people also want it. Your inner brat wants it at any price. Just try and stop me! The behavioral component is what you do about it, which usually involves some type of rebellious reaction. You see this with teenagers whose nave have xan them to date certain people. If so, let go of the pursuit. Pauline Wallin, Ph. Please Register or Login to post new comment. Access the best success, personal development, health, fitness, business, and financial advice De-Cluttering Your Mind and Emotions.
Take thsy Self Improvement Tour. Login Help. Average: 4. Your rating: None Average: 4 2 votes. This song, now decades old, addresses a universal truth. Here are three reasons why this is so: 1. Author's Bio:. Whzt Fortin. Kevin R. Dale Miller Dieting and Weight Loss. Guest brenda. Post new how to catch a squirrel with a homemade trap Please Register or Login to post new comment.
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Apr 19, · Guys want what they can’t have. It’s likely that when you were actively looking for a boyfriend, you came across as a little eager or maybe even desperate. They can sense that and then getting you starts to feel too easy for them. Jan 12, · However, they dont seem to present any excitement for us, actually they are kind of boring – at least to us. Ironically, the bad boy or girl occupies significant time and space in our minds. The emotional part is your inner brat saying, “Oh yeah? I can’t have what I want? Just try and stop me!” The behavioral component is what you do about it, which usually involves some type of rebellious reaction. You see this with teenagers whose parents have forbidden them to date certain people.4/5.
The fact is, despite all that rejection, we just want that one person so much more. Then, there's the all-important question: Why? We, as humans, are vain by our very nature. We all like to feel special, attractive and important, as these are all things that pump up our pride, confidence and self-image.
The same is true of carrying a burning desire for that certain person you cannot win over. With personal vanity wounded, your mind will try to get your own sense of self-worth back up to what it was. Chasing this person more aggressively will most likely push him or her even farther away from you, wounding personal vanity further and making you want him or her even more.
Our minds place value on things without us even realizing, and there are forces at work, which determine the value of a certain thing or a certain someone. These forces are called supply and demand. Yes, it may seem odd to use a core principle of economics to try and explain the inner workings of the human mind, but allow me to elaborate.
Something low in demand but high in supply is seen as less valuable; whereas, something high in demand but low in supply is seen as more valuable. The same is true of us humans when we place value on objects, experiences and even people. This makes the person more valuable to us, which in turn, makes us want the person more because we see him or her as higher in value. The truth of it, in those cases when we desire someone, the more restricted and scarce he or she is to us, the more we want him or her.
Desire is double-edged. We desire others according to our personal tastes, experiences and sexual preferences, but desire also has a social element. We tend to more so desire those who are desired by others. The same is true of objects and things. This is due to social proof. If someone else desires something, our minds tell us it may have a quality that could interest us, which we find intriguing.
So, if other people also desire that one person you want, it will make you want the person even more. This also has an explanation rooted in jealousy. If someone else wants what we want, it may trigger our natural competitiveness in order to beat someone else to the punch. This goes back to both vanity and scarcity. Being with that one desirable person will boost self-esteem; it feeds our personal vanity and the desire to be in favor with someone we perceive as high in value.
One of the principles by which our minds work is reciprocity. If we do something for someone, we unconsciously expect the person to do something for us in return. If someone does something for us, most of us feel compelled to reciprocate by doing something of around equal value in return. When we invest time in someone, we unconsciously expect a return for the time we gave. If you add other things into the mix — favors, dinner dates, etc. The less the person reciprocates, the more time we tend to invest trying to get the person to reciprocate.
This makes us more invested and raises our unconscious expectations of some kind of return from that person. The more we invest, and the less the person reciprocates, the more we want the person because we have invested a lot. Annoyingly, investing too much time and energy in someone without the person wanting it will usually push the person away. So, when you want someone whom you simply cannot have, the best thing is to relax, step back and not invest so much into that someone no matter how difficult that may be.
By Rajeet Singh. The answers boil down to the dynamics of the human mind, with four specific principles at play: 1. Nobody wants to feel powerless, unattractive or unable to affect people. Scarcity Our minds place value on things without us even realizing, and there are forces at work, which determine the value of a certain thing or a certain someone. Desire Desire is double-edged. Over-Investment One of the principles by which our minds work is reciprocity.